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So Tell Me Honestly, How Was Your Holiday?

People might surprise you and tell you the truth one day -- so listen up.

When I sat down to write my post-holiday, pre-New Year’s Eve blog post, I was in a playful mood and wanted to have some fun.  We can do that in Life Coaching, you know. In session, I often bring humor into the mix since we all know how powerful laughter is for creative problem solving.

Usually after the holidays when you are back at work, people inquire as to how your days off were. The answers are usually benign and sound something like this:

“Oh, it was very nice. We all went to my brother’s house and spent Christmas with the family there”.

“Yes, it was lovely. My parents flew in from Chicago and there were 20 of us at the dinner table”.

“Thanks for asking. It was a lot of fun!”

I am sure you would agree that those are the typical answers that you'll hear.  So, why not be creative and see if who you are talking to is actually listening to you?  Give it a shot and try one of these answers on for size: 

“Oh, it was really very nice. We all went to my brother’s house where my sister-in-law proceeded to have a complete meltdown. The turkey was burned and the food was awful. We all ended up with stomachaches and couldn’t wait until we got home”.

“Yes, it was lovely. My parents got stuck in Chicago and never made it in. It was such a relief to have the house all to ourselves and not have to deal with my father’s excessive drinking.”

“Thanks for asking. We had to call the fire department after my husband built a fire and neglected to open the flue. The house filled completely with smoke and I’ve decided to consult with a divorce attorney”.

Hmm, how refreshing would it be to hear answers like that? Even if the person was kidding, it would generate some smiles (I think). And if they weren’t kidding, what better way to deal with an unpleasant holiday than to name it, speak openly about it, and send it off to its final resting place. That is so much healthier than pretending it was joyous if it was not and burying your true feelings. Because for every person who has had a wonderful holiday, there are others in equal measure who have not.

The holidays can be great and they can be awful. The trick is to understand that we all have experienced both types. So to deal with the disappointment on those not-so-great holidays -- surround yourself with people who appreciate your candor, who support you in your honesty, and who understand that like life, some holidays are good and some are bad. The goal isn't to have everything perfect, but rather to be able to take a deep breath, deal with the good and bad, move forward and realize that 2012 will be great. 

And how do I know it will be great?  Because good or bad, you are upright, breathing, and able to experience all of 2012 day-by-day to grow and learn as you see fit. And that’s a wish about 2012, that every rich person in the cemetery doesn’t get to make.

Happy New Year my friends!

Life Coach Liz Hoffmann owns Atlas Coaching LLC.  Liz's office is in Fairfield Center and she is accepting new clients starting in January, 2012.  To make an appointment with Liz, please send her an email at Liz@AtlasCoaching.net.

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Creeky June 18, 2013 at 08:46 pm
FHA Exposed, you can rest. She turned herself in:Read More http://www.justice.gov/usao/ct/Press2013/20130604.html If you are looking for some comeuppance for those that kept this quiet, and handled what they could out of the public's eye, I wish you success in your endeavors, and the best of luck--I think you'll need it.
Thomas Paine June 18, 2013 at 10:21 pm
Creeky - For a dead guy, I try to keep busy: http://wilton.patch.com/blogs/thomas-paines-blog
Creeky June 18, 2013 at 10:59 pm
Thomas, you certainly do. I enjoyed "Outside the Box."
Creeky June 18, 2013 at 09:34 pm
Atticus, Ralph Arnone is next scheduled to appear in court on July 1st, at which point he isRead More expected to enter a plea. As an aside, one isn't supposed to go to bed and wake up still angry at the same thing, day in, day out, week in, week out, month in, month out... I'm not trying to give you a hard time. I care deeply about firefighters and I'm genuinely concerned about you. You were exposed to a lot of chemicals in your career. You may have some endocrine system damage or something causing an electrolyte disorder. This stuff starts out with things like joint pain and minor psychological implications but, it gets much, much worse. Get to the doc. Maybe you're just a spicy guy, maybe Ralph hurt you in some terrible way, or maybe you are sick and as a result, you'll be facing a much shortened a painful life. Honestly, I'm not trying to give you a hard time or pick a fight.
Atticus Fich June 19, 2013 at 06:01 am
Well thanks for your concern Creeky. But at my age I cant say I have lived a shorten life. As forRead More chemicals...well as most of the posters here on this rag say, firemen do nothing 99.9% of the day so I guess the on chemical exposure would be to the big comfy leather chairs in the dayroom. Why do you care anyway Creeky? In your previous posts about me you said, don't feed to trolls. You are not honest Creeky. Take your fake concern and false "honesty" and waste it on someone else. Not trying to give you a hard time, those are your comments about me. Where did you get the info on Ralphy?
Creeky June 19, 2013 at 08:05 am
Atticus, review your own posts. It isn't trolling. It's a vendetta. If you think I'm dishonest,Read More fine. I'm not going to try to speak rationally with someone whom is irrational. Why do I care? Because I've seen how much care fireman are capable of, and how much they give of themselves. It's respect and karma. As far as where I got the info, it's publicly available. If you wanted my help in how to find it yourself, perhaps you shouldn't have attacked my character. You are on your own now.